WHY ARE NONE OF YOU FUCKERS FLIPPING SHIT?!?
NASA HAS DECLARED PLUTO A PLANET AGAIN
IT HAS MOONS!!!!! IT HAS MOONS!!!!!!!
WHAT. WHAT! PLUTO YOU FUCKING DID IT!
VIVA LA PLUTO, YOU DID IT!!!
I can’t find a source. Does anyone have any? I won’t believe it until I get a source.
Is this The War Doctor?
no, it’s John in Afghanistan
John in Afghanistan
it’s a war doctor either way
I JUST SPLIT MY TEA EVERY WHERE!!!
From Hong Kong to Ferguson: Justice now! Freedom now! Democracy now! Human rights now! Peace now! Equality now!
*calls u a nerd*
*is actually very deeply in love with u*
When you’re masturbating in your room and about to cum, then someone knocks on your door.
You’re born with a ton of fucks to give, so you spend them like a kid with a credit card. You give fucks about your friends, about your grades, about your fashion sense, about strangers’ opinions. You give way too many fucks about way too many things. You have so many. Then, as you get older, you have maybe 10 fucks per month, so you learn to budget them. You allocate fucks to family and career, but there aren’t enough fucks to give to the newest fads. Oh, someone at work has something they need my help with that’s outside my job title? I’ll do my best to allocate some fucks, but this month is pretty tight. Then, as you get even older, you’re down to 1-2 fucks per month, and those fucks are pretty damn precious. You give them to your family and your hobbies and your job, and that’s kinda it. It’s not your fault – fucks expire too quickly. I would’ve liked to save my fucks from when I was younger but I can’t. Then, you hit fuck insolvency. You’re getting like 1 fuck a year, and you have to make it last. So you go without, and even previously fuck-worthy things, you just can’t give a fuck. Some people run out really quickly, Some people have a fuck trust fund that pays out a decent amount even into old age. But at some point, the fuck faucet runs completely dry and you’re out of fucks to give. It’s just basic Fuckonomics.
-Unknown English Teacher (via swarthyvillain)
I’ve never read anything more fucking true in my whole fucking life.
Well if this isn’t fucking meta…I don’t know what is.
It’s just basic Fuckonomics
things your friends will say if you’ve made a good pun:
- get out
- fuck you
- shut the fuck up
- oh my god why
- you need to stop
- you’re not funny
- that was terrible